What was Sarai thinking?

Genesis 16:1-2
"Now Sarai, Abram's wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian maid servant named Hagar; so she said to Abram, 'The Lord has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my maidservant; perhaps I could build a family through her.' Abram agreed to do what Sarai said."

These thoughts are random (This was your warning!):

For those of you who don't know, Aaron and I have been trying to get pregnant. As the months pass, my heart gets sadder. I am trusting God, but wishing all the same. This last week my friend Nikki found out she was pregnant. I am so super excited for her!!! At the same time my own heart is sad for myself. I could not imagine if I sent another woman into Aaron only to conceive children I had not. With Aaron and I, I really know in my heart we are in this together. If another woman were involved, the whole thing would just be a mess.

One of the other things I think about often is God's timing when Sarah did conceive. She bore Isaac, whom later bore Jacob. Jacob became the headship, beginning & leader of Israel. I'm pretty sure Sarah went through many times of grief, but in the end God's plan was bigger.

P.S. I was thinking today and realized that I dislike when people try to comfort me with words. I've been thinking of my friend Katrina (who lost her brother to cancer in Oct.), us trying to conceive, losing my job, etc. I love when people send encouragement (such as scripture, thanks Sally Rose!) or a thinking of you card, or other such things. I hate when people say, "In God's time," "It'll all work out," etc. But then again, maybe it is when people say it because they don't know what else to say or they don't want to say what they really think.

When someone says "In God's time," I just want to shout from the roof top that I know it is all in God's timing, but it doesn't take away the fact that I want my timing more. When people say, "It is all in God's plan," I want to shout, "I know it is in God's plan & He has something better, but for now I was comfortable the way things were."

Most of the time I just like to cry, ponder, cry, ponder, and then pick up my sorry butt off the ground and move on. As my mom has always said, "She will talk about it, but it will be when she is ready."